photoFor the last two weeks, like Mary Jane, I’ve been trying to see the elusive Spiderman.  It seems the harder I tried to see him, the more elusive he became… just when I was at the point where I was about to jump off a building to get him to come out of hiding, he appeared.  But let me take you back to where it all began…

Two years ago, I met Peter Parker.  I was drawn to him but through misinformation I was led to believe that he was considerably younger than me, so I chose not to make my feelings know.  Turns out he had a girlfriend at the time so it wouldn’t have mattered.

Five weeks ago, I was at my favorite yoga studio, when I tapped a guy on the shoulder. He was wearing a baseball cap backwards, earbuds blocking out everyone around him and a hint of grey in his facial scruff, so he seemed like a good person to ask, “Have you ever heard of Tony Robbins?” He had, which was a huge relief, because the two twenty-year-olds I was talking to hadn’t and I was feeling OLD!

After class, he waited for me.  Throughout class he’d been trying to figure out how he knew me, and he finally had.  Now that I was actually looking at his face head on, I immediately recognized him too.

Two weeks ago, a work colleague and I had lunch with him, and Peter and I stayed for an extra hour, talking.  He was a very interesting guy.  The next night, we met at yoga and talked for an hour in the parking lot.  He had taken a cross country trip that he wanted to tell me about, so we agreed to get together soon.  I left feeling like a giddy teenager, not a feeling I’d had in a long, long time…

And as the days went by, he would text… and text……. and text……….. I subtly texted back after a week that I don’t like texting, I prefer hearing someone’s voice or even better, seeing him in person.  And that’s when Peter turned into the elusive Spiderman.  He seemed to want to see me, but when I’d try to get a date and time out of him, the subject changed.  The multi-converations in the texts were causing a lot of confusion. At one point he completely blew off a plan we’d made to meet at the yoga studio because he hadn’t realized it was actually a plan.  My own “Spidey senses” were getting suspicious at this point, so I sent him an honest text about how I was feeling and gave him an “out”.  He didn’t take it.  Instead, we made a plan to meet Sunday.  However, his definition of a plan is “a leaf floating in a stream”: wherever it goes, it goes.  My idea of a plan is a “kayak on the rapids”: you know from where you’re leaving and what time, you have the right equipment, pack an emergency kit, and water, and have a life preserver.  I realize, we are going to have to meet in the middle somewhere like a rowboat on a lake sometime in the afternoon.

Bottom line is, come Sunday morning, I had not heard from him, come Sunday afternoon, I had not heard from him.. so I went to see a movie.  When I got out of the movie I heard from him.  He was asking if I was going to suspension yoga.  I replied that I was.  He asked if I wanted to go to the beach after.  I unenthusiastically replied, “Sure.”  I’m quick to see writing on the wall before there’s any ink.

When I showed up to yoga, I had no idea if he was coming.  He did.  So, I spent the first 90 minutes of our first official date with Spiderman, hanging upside-down, and flying through the air on aerial swings.  Suspension yoga is my obsession, so I loved it, and I was glad he enjoyed it as well.

I had loosened up by this point (maybe it was the kiss), slipped into a new sundress and we headed to the beach at sunset.  This is were I go off on a tangent to tell you about my wardrobe malfunction.  It’s a good thing that we had planned an evening at the beach and not a day, because apparently, my sundress was not a dress at all, but a skirt, and therefore would not stay up.  I literally stood up as I got out of his car, and it just came down.  The bushes I was facing got an eyeful.  I pulled it up, but quickly realized it would not stay.  Had it been the day, I would not have brought along a sweatshirt.  I quickly zipped up the sweatshirt and pulled the skirt down over my hips, where apparently it belongs.  I asked Peter if my white sweatshirt was see-through.  He paused, then replied, “I don’t know that I’d tell you if it was, that said, no, it’s not.” (so cute!) Okay back to the date…

Peter and I found two wooden lounge chairs to sit on, facing the tide and we talked.  I voiced my concerns, which really weren’t about the fact that he wasn’t making a solid plan, but why he didn’t want to see me.  I liked him, I wanted to see him, so I had to know why he didn’t feel the same way.  The deeper I dug, it came down to fear.  But as the sky grew darker, the fireflies surrounded us (turns out they were just bugs in the reflection of car headlights), and the chill gave me a good reason to slip onto his chair so he could wrap himself around me to keep me warm, I let down my guard and surrendered, open to seeing where this might go.

We talked for four hours.  By the time we both realized how hungry we were, we also realized that nothing was open at that time of night.  So, he gave me a delicious kiss good night.  Now it’s in his hands…

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  1. Sue Painter says:

    Oh my, he does seem spidery, doesn’t he? Maybe he’s one you’ll just fly around in yoga with and that will be it.

  2. Sounds like a lovely time at the beach, and now I am looking for suspension yoga nearby…

    I recently had a similar situation in that we had met in person and hit it off and then had drinks together two nights in a row. Then, we made plans for dinner a couple nights later, and he got all “I just want to get to know you better via text” on me.

    Like you, I find that a very frustrating way to “get to know” a person; so, after a few days of it, I ended up totally confused and realized I was no longer even interested in trying to untangle the confusion.

    Onward and upward (into suspension yoga perhaps!)

    Thanks for sharing,


  3. Mitch Tublin says:

    Oh what a web you weave! Just as I climb through and permit myself to become trapped in your web – it stops! The end. Oh the tragedy! Want more…

  4. Heidi Alexandra says:

    As always I love reading and living vicariously through your dates. He sounds hesitant and yet isn’t that what we also find intriguing. Maybe you had a lot to talk about after the blood rush to the head hanging upside down. Sounds more like a batman bat hanging upside down than a spiderman to me!

  5. Hmmm…Very mysterious. He definitely seems like a hard one to figure out. I’m curious to see how this turns out.

  6. Lisa Manyon says:

    Ohhh… cannot wait to hear more about this one.
    Write on!~

  7. I do hope it works out but be careful and don’t get hurt. I say trust your instincts – you’re good at that!

  8. Glad you had a good date, but wow, you sure do have a lot of interesting dating stories. Good thing you seem to be adventurous at heart.

  9. Shirl Gard says:

    Great story. Guess I’m going to have to live my love life vicariously through Jessica.
    I took a screen shot of this comment template and emailed it to my website guy, to see if I can get something similar put on my website, so it’s easier to see. You can’t miss this one.

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